Sometimes we get stuck seeing things our way. Would you like to see some things through another set of eyes? Maybe it will make you think and stretch or maybe just chuckle or shed a tear. Here is my world through my eyes...
I completed the book Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close by Jonathan Safran Foer. I read the book because I had wanted to see the movie when it came out earlier in the year, but missed it. Since my experience tells me that the book is always better I thought I might as well read the book and then see the movie when it comes out on DVD.
As expected after having read about the movie and seeing previews of the movie, the book was about Oskar Schell a 9 year old boy whose father died in the 911 events. Oskar is not your typical child nor is he a typical boy. Quirky and unique Oskar deals with his father's death in a very unexpected manner.
Because of the closeness Oskar had with his father and the very original activities they shared, Oskar is lead into a truly odd way of dealing with his father's death. Oskar finds a vase in his father's closet with a small envelope with an unusual key in it. On the envelope it says "Black". Because he and his father have done similar things when his Dad was alive Oskar determines that this is his father's way of telling him something and now he just has to figure out what the key goes to in order to know what his father wanted to tell him. So we are off to the races as Oskar with his great intellect and original creativity seeks to find his father's meaning. The story is really great. It is a real testament to how close and influential a father son relationship can be.
However, there is an additional story that is woven through the book. Oskar's grandparents have a unique story of their own. Oskar doesn't know his grandfather and has never met him. But the story of his grandparents marriage and relationship is told very open with sometimes too much detail.
This second story serves as a counter point to show how hurtful a father's relationship can be as well--only this story is told from the father's relationship. How emotionally harmed he is because of his poor choices with his son.
The point seems to be that father's and son's desperately need the relationship with each other to have a meaningful existence. Two other much shorter father-son stories are in the book as well. One positive and one negative. The author shares his point again that father's need their sons and sons need their fathers.
The book left me a bit confused about whether I liked it or not. There were parts that I found objectionable balanced by parts that I found very affirming of good. Once again the balance, maybe intended by the author, forcing, I think, the reader to determine the meaning of the book. Most likely each reader's determination of the meaning will be determined by their own relationship with their father, and that unwritten relationship influencing the reader will ultimately determine what the reader gains from the book.
Then today, by chance, I saw a movie that helped me to put this book in perspective: Facing the Giants. This movie is an earlier one by the same group that put out Courageous which I have raved about in the past. This movie is great as well. Strong on the Christian values and slightly preachy, it touches the heart, especially male hearts.
There is a part in the movie's story that really touched me however and continued this theme of father son relationships from the book Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close.
A young man and his father move into the little town portrayed there. The father is a college professor and is in a wheelchair. His son is a soccer player but the town doesn't have soccer at the school, only football. So the father encourages the son to try out and he does, but he is intimidated by the sport but is kept on the team as a back up kicker. Consequently he plays very little. The couch gives him a few opportunities to kick field goals throughout the season but mostly he rides the bench. Each of the few times he kicks a field goal his father calls his name after his son is lined up and in an encouraging gesture from a seated position in his wheel chair raises both his arms straight up to indicate "You can do it".
After losing their first three games miserably, the team ends up making it to the state finals through a variety of miracles. As you might guess the game comes down to needing a field goal with 2 seconds left for the win. The first string kicker is hurt during the game and so it is up to the young man with weak confidence. But there is a problem. A 51 yard field goal is needed and this young man has never hit one from that distance. His longest field goal even in practice has been only 39 yards. The coach encourages him but the young man tells the coach that he can't do it. The coach sends him to the field anyways and the boy lines up to kick. He is shaking his head as he lines up because he knows he cannot do what is required. His coach sees the boys utter lack of confidence and wishes he could call a time out to encourage him more but they have used all their time outs. The father calls the boys name to do his normal encouraging symbol but the boy refuses to look because he is so utterly sure he cannot do it that he will not allow himself to receive any encouragement.
The opposing coach calls a time out to "ice the kicker". The coach does his best during the time out to encourage the kicker and when he returns to the field and lines up to take his kick this time he looks over to his father's spot to allow his Dad to encourage him. Now the boy wants to try his best. But his father and his wheelchair are gone. The boy is surprised and disappointed but must do his part. He looks to the goal post down the field to get his bearings and there is his Dad standing just behind the fence behind the goal post. Standing on unsteady legs, leaning forward against the fence to hold himself up with his arms raised straight up from his sides to encourage his son. In essence saying "We can do hard things".
The kicker now will give it his all after the strong words of encouragement from his coach and his father who has done a hard thing to encourage his son. The ball is hiked and he steps to the ball to kick it with all that he has. He kicks the ball so hard that the motion pulls his left leg out from under him and he ends up on his back. Yes the ball splits the uprights and the game it won. Good prevails one more time.
So what is it about fathers and sons and the profound relationship of love and encouragement that they have between the two of them. What is it about the son who listens, trusts and honors his father that makes the Father want to be a better man? What is it about the father who loves, respects and encourages his son that makes the son want to do his best and be just like his Dad? This relationship has the potential to really determine the path of both of them.
Please father's don't let your sons down. And sons, honor your fathers and that will help them be more worthy fathers.
Here is a trailer from the movie Facing the Giants:
Here is the part of the movie that I've described above. Little does the coach know that God wasn't done with him for that day. Watch the movie to get the rest of the story!
Sometimes in our world today men have the reputation for doing whatever has to be done. That translates differently for men in different situations and has both positive and negative connotations.
In days gone by many men prided themselves in doing whatever it took to support their family. They did jobs that were difficult and dirty and jobs that did not use their best talents or engage them intellectually. They just did whatever it took to be sure their families had at least the bare minimum and hopefully more. I think that is an admirable trait: willingness to go beyond the comfortable or the preferred to take care of the family.
Nowadays, though; when we talk about men doing whatever has to be done it gets understood that men will do what it necessary, but no more. That leads our minds down a totally different road thinking of men who go to work but won't help around the house or spend all their time in front of the T.V. or involved in selfish pursuits that give little if anything to the family. So which is it for you? As a Manly Man are you willing to do whatever is necessary and within your power to make sure your families needs are met and maybe some wants too? Or are you a guy who does the bare minimum and then checks out; never doing anything that is out of your comfort zone or requires growth on your part for the betterment of your family?
The latter man suggests a lack of connection to his family, a lack of commitment to the family and a lack of energy, effort and caring for those who are most important in his life. D&C 58:27 "Verily I say, men should be anxiously engaged in a good cause, and do many things of their own free will, and bring to pass much righteousness."
Of course in this scripture the word "men" refers to both genders but for our purposes here I am talking to Manly Men. This scripture tells us that we should be anxiously engaged. This suggests effort, enjoyment and full participation. Anxiously engaged in our families would be good. "And do many things of their own free will". This suggests to me that we should be involved so much that we notice what needs to be done and don't leave it up to our family to ask, compel, beg or guilt us into doing stuff. Of course I'm not suggesting that everything will be evident to us and of course we will need guidance, support and encouragement from our wife and family, but we need to be attentive to life and the needs of the family members as well. "And bring to pass much righteousness" of course suggests that our efforts should be good and worthy efforts not just the bare minimum.
Certainly there are times as men when we are worn out physically, mentally, maybe even spiritually and our attention or efforts will not be our best. But they should always be the best we can manage at the time. If for some reason we are depleted then we need to make our spouse aware of that so they will know and can help us as they are able. If we keep these times to ourselves then not only do we miss out on support and help but we also pretend that we are better than we are and need nothing which will lead to our receiving just that. However; if we find that we are hurting and less able much or all of the time then we need to seek help so we can approach our best selves, our families deserve that.
"All men have been given special powers and within certain limitations should develop those powers, give vent to their own imaginations, and not become rubber stamps. They should develop their own talents and abilities and capacities to their limit and use them to build up the kingdom" (The Teachings of Spencer W. Kimball, p. 257).
This comment by President Kimball really reminds us that we are unique and have special abilities even "powers" as he calls them. These defining characteristics were probably what made us appealing to our wife in the first place. We of course need to develop them and use our imaginations to better use and grow them for the benefit of our families, ourselves and even our societies.
The kingdom is waiting for us to develop them. Whether we refer to our own homes and families or the church and God's kingdom or our neighborhoods, country and the world. We are needed whether our talents only help to support our families (physically, emotionally and spiritually) or goes beyond that to aid and supplement the needs of the world.
Let us not do the minimum, but develop ourselves and our families and God's kingdom so that we all benefit from our best. As Manly Men we need to lead out and be a good example to all around us.
While reading The Hidden Christ by James L. Ferrell, I came across his idea that the creation of the world is parallel to a man becoming more like our Savior. In essence if we study the creation of the world and apply it to us as men, we can see that we go through stages in our growth and maturity to become like the Savior similar to the creating of the earth. It is such an interesting idea to me and I have been considering it and thinking about it. I'm still in beginning phases but here is what I came up with:
Initially the earth empty desolate and dark. It is like a man before he is touched by the light of Christ or a world touched by light from the sun. When we allow ourselves to go toward Christ, the light, then changes start to happen. When we insist on doing things "our way", being selfish and not caring what God has to tell us and how He wants us to live then we are dark and not growing spiritually. So when the light is introduced to us as men we can choose to allow it to light the way before us and show us the way or we can turn our backs and retreat to the dark.
On the second day the air or firmament was created which surrounds the earth. The air may be like the spirit that can surround us when we turn to and follow the light. As we go toward or trust in or believe in the light, and remain in the light of God, then we have increased opportunities to be taught by and protected by the Spirit. So the firmament is comparable to increasingly having the Spirit in our lives to open our minds and to be instructed in Godly things and to increase our understanding of the purpose of life.
On the third day water, soil and vegetation were placed on the earth. Now with the air and the light the earth is being prepared to grow things. Similarly when we have turned ourselves to the light and have the Spirit to instruct us we are now being prepared to grow and become something different than we have managed to make of ourselves. On this day seeds are planted and begin to grow just like the seeds of the spirit can be planted in us and we can begin to see them growth spiritually as well.
On the fourth day the sun the moon and the stars were put into the sky in their designated rotations. For us this may be comparable to being around light sources that nourish and encourage us in our growth. This may include people in our church family, the Bishop and others who can guide us. Some will help a little and some a lot as the need and the circumstance may determine. Christ and Heavenly Father are the ultimate light, but other lesser lights can frequently help us, even rescue us when they are acting in God's behalf and we are in need of it.
On the fifth day are the fishes and fowls created. These may represent larger and greater gifts from God, maybe even a graduation from the milk (basic gospel principles) to meatier gospel principles. More likely the application of the principles already learned lead us to increasingly important and difficult principles to incorporate into our lives. As the earth began to be populated in preparation for mankind, maybe we become more prepared to be the hands of God to meet the needs of others. Thus being His instruments in the world to help lead others to Christ.
Finally on the sixth day animals and then man and woman are placed on the earth. This may represent that ultimately as we progress in the creation of a Godly man, just like the creation of the earth, that we become sons and daughters to Christ (who created the world). In other words, we begin to resemble him in our growth and maturity such that we are recognizable as his followers or rather, sons and daughters.
Celestial room in the Sao Paulo Temple
Lastly the seventh day of creation or the rest comes. We anticipate that our day of rest will come eventually where we will rest from daily earthly cares after the resurrection. I suspect this rest will not be like an extended vacation but a ceasing of the daily struggle against sin that is a constant part of our life. Our hope is to be in the Celestial Kingdom where God dwells but in order for that to become a reality we must become like Him. Though that is not expected to occur totally in this life it is necessary that we begin to work or allow ourselves to be changed to a celestial being. This work needs to start when we begin to understand the need for it. It appears to be a lengthy process.
So as Manly Men we need to work toward that goal and prepare ourselves with recognition of where we are in that process and where we still need to grow. With that recognition we can make choices that move us toward God and away from worldly debilitating influences. Keep up the good work!
I attended a funeral today for Ruby Alderson. She used to live in our ward many years ago. She was a gentle and kind person, always willing to serve and to help others. When she lived here she was a member while her husband attended another church. He would make sure she made it to church and then attend his own church. After they both retired they moved to a retirement community in Orlando Florida. While there they continued that arrangement until Ruby had a stroke. At that point her husband became her caretaker and on Sundays he would take her and stay with her at her church. In the funeral today it was said he did this because "her religion meant more to her than his did to him". He knew she wanted to attend church despite her physical infirmity after the stroke.
Preston England temple
After attending church for a while with her he decided he wanted to be baptized and so he was. Immediately their goal was to go and get sealed in the temple. A few months into preparing to get sealed in the temple her husband became sick and he called his daughter for help and she came out, took him to the ER and got him help. They immediately moved back to Virginia to live with their daughter so she could provide the help they both needed at that point. Within two weeks of the move he died. So Ruby realized that she would need a proxy for him so they could be sealed in the temple. While preparing for that Ruby worsened and got so she couldn't travel. Now Ruby has died and their wish to be sealed for eternity in the temple has not occurred...yet.
Washington DC temple
That is one great thing about the temple. It is the great leveler. It equalizes everyone, able to provide necessary ordinances even if they died before they could be done on their own. Possibly before they had the chance or before they even had the opportunity to make a decision about the gospel of Jesus Christ. Today many argue whether this doctrine or that doctrine is really of Christ. Some don't even care anymore what Christ taught or has revealed through his prophets deciding that they will do what they want anyway and hope that all will be accepted by the Savior in the end.
San Diego Temple
The temple gives all mankind a chance to have the saving ordinances done and then they individually will have the opportunity to accept or decline for themselves. God is fair and gives opportunities to his children when they didn't have them in life. Situations in this world that seem unfair are made right-in the temple. That is what temples are for, to level the "playing field" so to speak so that all can have access to Christ's greatest blessings. Who can deny that the temple is necessary for that purpose, to make things fair and to repair hopes that were dashed or never even conceived. People through many ages of the world have yearned to understand or to have things be fair. The temples do that.
Freiberg Germany Temple
So our part is of service. We can provide service to those that have not had these ordinances done for them by being worthy to act for them in the temples to assure that they have a choice that will guide their future, or to be "imprisoned" as it were, by "the luck of the draw" and fickle fate. Our energy and service is needed to be the hands of God to bless these people with a choice, a real choice, and not lock them into decisions made or a lack of opportunities based on ignorance or unavailability in their life here on earth. I vote for choice.
Provo Utah Temple
Let's do the work that gives all of God's children the opportunity to be blessed according to their desires and not their circumstances.
This is something I think about nearly every school day. I'm a guidance counselor in a public school, so I get the privilege and opportunity to recite the Pledge of Allegiance every school day throughout the year. However, like many things which are repeated over and over, the words of the pledge can lose their meaning to those who speak them frequently and automatically. I think many who recite the pledge do so somewhat robotically, able to frame the words without fully engaging their brains. (I'm certainly capable of doing so!)
I have found that virtually everyone who says the pledge adds a comma (,) where it doesn't belong. And this tiny little pause completely changes the meaning of the pledge. Think about the power of a comma to change meaning. Here are a couple of examples:
"We think we understand" versus "We think, we understand."
"We believe we can" versus "We believe, we can."
"God rest ye, merry gentlemen" versus "God rest ye merry, gentlemen." (You can check out the different meanings of these two phrases through Mannheim Steamroller, which has produced a different song for each meaning!)
I've found that most people say the pledge like this, with commas--or pauses--marked by *:
I pledge allegiance * to the flag * of the United States of America*
and to the republic * for which it stands * one nation * under God *
indivisible * with liberty * and justice for all.
I think it would be more accurate and meaningful if it were spoken like this:
Jon McNaughton artist, click here to learn more about this painting.
I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America *
And to the republic for which it stands *
One nation under God *
Indivisible *
With liberty and justice for all.
Most people pause after "One nation..." It is such a common and widespread practice that people who are around me when the pledge is said always notice that I recite this line as one phrase: One nation under God. That's how the phrase should be said. And that makes a huge difference.
If we are "under God", then we defer to Him. If we are "under God", we follow Him. And I believe that if we defer to God and follow Him; if we truly strive to be "under God" and subject our wills to His, then we will find that it is actually possible to be a nation indivisible, to be truly united and unified.
This post is written in answer to a post on Modern Mormon Men blog written by Matt Lipps. Please read his post by clicking here. It will make my post even more understandable!
When I was a young man aged 18 I was planning on a mission. I had been planning for years. Maybe because of my uncle who was a missionary for another church and had served his life as a missionary to Haiti and was celibate throughout, it was impressed in my mind that a mission was JUST for two years and then we were expected to get onto the even more important business of building a family. Consequently, and unusually I'll bet, I studied to be a husband and parent for years before I served a mission. Yes, I read books on the subject, but probably more importantly I paid attention to several examples around me. I paid attention to my Dad and Mom and how they related to each other. I watched my sister and her husband and learned all kinds of good things for my eventual marriage. The married ward members provided me with supplimental material as I paid attention to the little ways they showed that they cared about each other...or not.
Now I don't tell you that to make all Mormon young men think that is what they should be doing with their time. After all, I just did that with a little bit of my time. I still liked playing and watching sports, adventures, and of course girls. What I am trying to say is that I think most of us have noticed some of these things about the relationships going on around us. We have likely noted things to do and not to do in a marriage relationship from our parents. Consequently, we are not without preparation. Even if you have been totally inattentive or lacking in opportunity and missed it growing up, you now have time to start paying attention, learning and preparing for marriage.
So many people are worried that they are not ready to get married. I doubt very many people can be ready due to the fact that generally we cannot anticipate adequately most of the ways that marriage requires us to learn, grow, stretch, and repent. All we have to be is committed to the institution of marriage by accepting that it is the pattern that we need to be a part of in our life and then to choose a person (note, I do not say fall in love) but choose a person that we decide we will love and commit to not stop loving them. Voila you have a marriage ready to start and then can get down to the real work of marriage after the ceremony.
The real work of marriage is of course making it last forever. If we worry over much about getting ready to marry we will be tempted to think that the work is over when we are married. Admittedly it does feel like that after you have gone through an engagement and done all the preparation that our society demands to get married; but that is just the beginning. Now begins the real work of learning, respecting, repenting, loving, growing spiritually and every other way, caring, accepting our weaknesses and making them into strengths or at least adequately kick-starting the change, forgiving, sacrificing and the many other things that are a part of marriage. Then after that foundation--whether months or years--have children and dig deeper into all the things you thought you had learned, because now you have to know them well enough to teach someone else--not just think you know them enough to get by--but really know them inside and out.
I suspect that there are additional major transitions in married life yet to come that I haven't experienced yet. Maybe the transition we call empty nest which some might say should be called "empty next". Then what about maintaining a marriage through the older years of loss and infirmity. Caring enough for each other to still love even when your spouse, or maybe you, can't show it in the same ways. Possibly finally showing that we will not forget our love, our promises and our covenants when only one of us remains here alive. Marriage and family life are so full of transitions, major and jarring transitions (sometimes) that we can't possibly prepare for them all adequately and yet we need to move forward through them and beyond when they occur. And don't forget learning all the cumulative lessons along the way.
You see my wife and I married shortly after each of us returned from a mission. We had minimal money, not even a car for the first couple years we were married. We didn't find that college courses nor low income were good enough reasons to not start having children right away. And when our first child was born dead we continued on despite the loss and pain. Why should we be spared the pain that many others go through? We learned about each other and used our challenges as methods to learn to trust and depend on each other. We always kept building our relationship and love for each other. There were frustrations, lack of money sometimes, always plenty of ways to spend what money we did have, but we wouldn't allow that to define our marriage or each of us individually. We even had joy throughout! Maybe not always as much as we hoped for but enough to let us know that life was good and that we were on the right track.
My wife and I knew each other as missionaries. When I returned home seven months before her from our mission I knew it was time to get going on the part of life that would really define me: husband and father. So when I considered my options a lightbulb went off in my mind when I thought I would like to marry someone like Lisa. Why not her?! Well there wasn't a good reason, so I waited until she finished her mission and flew to her state shere she picked me up from the airport and I asked her to marry me. Yup, it was our first date.
I know that in this day and age of caution and distrust, when we wonder if people are who they really seem to be and worry if they will continue in the same upward trajectory over the next many years that we find it hard to trust enough to choose. Often we either go with our hormones alone or give up and back out. Many let fear and uncertainty take control and we exclude ourselves until temptation or failure overcomes us. We have a resource to help and guide us (I'm talking about God here and not just parents and siblings and etc.), we have our own best efforts and our willingness to commit. Maybe I am most clear on the fact that I know I personally have a great influence on how things turn out--maybe we could call that confidence or maybe it is stupidity, you choose. Sure there is much outside of my control, but I prefer to see and accept and use what is within my control to work toward the goals that I choose and have covenanted to work toward.
The preparation for marriage was helpful, but the experience of living marriage was more worthwhile. Reading and watching got me thinking but reality got me acting in the ways I needed to act. Marriage is a fantastic way to learn who you really are and then repent and be better. The best preparation for a man is not the books or even the observation (though still valuable). The best preparation is an honorable mission. It will probably not make you feel ready for marriage and fatherhood, but it will start or strenthen your confidence and provide humility enough for growth. Missions also are great for young women to help them prepare for marriage. In their case however (possibly because they are older when they serve) it seems to polish the confidence and humility and etc. that they already had inklings of.
Oh, and a note about fears of getting married. Heavenly Father isn't the author of fear, rather he is the author of hope. Hope that like faith requires work and effort to make meaningful. So ditch the fear stuff and get on with it. If you have some emotional problems or special circumstances than get some help for those to get in better shape. If not then carry on, move forward and see what all the marriage hullabaloo is about.
While I am at my daughter's wedding having one of those top experiences in our life, I thought I would put together this list of some of my favorite posts that are not in the top ten. I have noticed recently lots of folks like to check out my top viewed posts but often missing some really thoughtful posts that have been published when as many folks were not looking. I hope you check them out and enjoy them, but maybe even better find some inspiration in them for you in your life.
So here are my top ten favorite posts that are not in the top ten: [click on the title of the post to go check it out]
So these are some of my favorites. I hope you enjoy them. I shouldn't be too long recuperating from the wedding so come back soon to see what else is floating around in my head.
[Note: Today's post comes in the words of Elder Neil L. Anderson of the Quorum of the Twelve from November 2010 Ensign p39-42]
"The road of discipleship is not for the spiritually faint of heart.
As we follow the Savior, without question there will be challenges that confront us. Approached with faith, these refining experiences bring a deeper conversion of the Savior's reality. Approached in a worldly way, these same experiences cloud our view and weaken our resolve.
Offense comes in many costumes and continually finds its way onstage. People we believe in disappoint us. We have unanticipated difficulties. Our life doesn't turn out exactly the way we were expecting. We make mistakes, feel unworthy, and worry about being forgiven...It could be a hundred things.
Paul admonished, :God hath not given us the spirit of fear;...Be not...ashamed of the testimony of our Lord. (2 Timothy 1:7-8)
I promise you, as you choose not to be offended or ashamed, you will feel His love and approval. you will know that you are becoming more like Him.
Will we understand everything? Of course not. We will put some issues on the shelf to be understood at a later time.
Will everything be fair? It will not. We will accept some things we cannot fix and forgive others when it hurts.
Will we feel separated on occasion from those around us? Absolutely.
I love these words from a favorite hymn: The soul that on Jesus hath leaned for repose I will not, I cannot, desert to his foes That soul, though all hell should endeavor to shake, I'll never, no never, I'll never, no never
I'll never, no never, no never forsake! (How firm a foundation #85)
Lord, to whom shall we go? though hast the words of eternal life....We believe and are sure that thou art that Christ, the Son of the living God. (John 6:68-69)"
Mark Mabry art of Christ coming to Nephites in the Book of Mormon
I was reading a blog by a fellow Mormon that inspired me to write a post about my experience with the Book of Mormon. I have read the Book of Mormon several times and in two languages. That certainly doesn't make me an expert on it, but it does indicate that I am pretty familiar with it. The first time I read it through was when I was a teenager and we were challenged in our early morning religion class before school to read it. I read it in about 34 days. At that particular time I found it exciting and enjoyable to read. It touched me with some of the things that were taught in it and I felt like it was what it purported to be, which is scripture.
I have grown up in the church and learned from the Book of Mormon right alongside the Bible. I attended three years at a private Christian middle school and had daily Bible classes. I have loved both books of scripture and found them both to coincide closely in teaching the words of Christ.
They both bring forth the importance of Christ and the hope that Christ has given humankind. One difference is that the Book of Mormon seems to concentrate more on the daily application of Christ's teachings as opposed to the Bible which seems more focused on declaring instruction from God to man.
I use them both in my life to guide me to understand what God wants me to know, to be inspired by his teachings and examples, and then to implement them into my life. The two together help me see the gospel in a more well rounded way and identify how the teachings apply to me as an American in this modern age. As one woman I respect (Chieko Okasaki) said "In principle great clarity, in practice great charity". The two books of scripture together give Christ's teachings more clarity in my mind, and coming from different cultures they help us to view their difference in implementation which allows us greater charity in seeing a larger variety of people attempting to live by Christ's teachings and example in the books.
In my quest to know if both books are truly from God for our benefit and growth, I have had my prayers answered and know that they are both true books of scripture which together are meant to guide us to correct doctrine and correct practice of the Gospel of Jesus Christ.
I hope that you will take the opportunity to study them both, and compare the fullness of God's Spirit that comes from both. I hope you will allow that Spirit to guide you in your application of the principles taught by prophets and our Savior in both books.
Here is a short video introduction to the Book of Mormon.
We men can be interesting creatures. Whether influenced by DNA, family training or cultural norms we often learn to keep our thoughts to ourselves and not share them often. This can impact our lives in a variety of ways. Many of us have learned that if we choose to keep our thoughts to ourselves that it can often get in the way of our relationships with our wife, if married, or interactions with ladies in general. When we keep our thoughts to ourselves we don't get practice sharing them and when we enter a relationship with a lady and find that sharing thoughts is an important part of relationships, then we often find ourselves fumbling and inadequate.
Related to that is we can learn to wall off our thoughts to others and keep them private creating a false sense that we can think whatever we want without causing harm to others. This is clearly false. Despite any proficiency that we develop in sealing in our harmful thoughts, those thoughts will leak out in our actions, body language and attitudes. Thoughts determine what we become and who we drag down along with us, or who we lift up as we go along through life.
In essence our thoughts become the breeding ground of all of our future and what we can become. It's not just a case of thinking good or bad things it can also be thinking productive and righteous things or thinking valueless and worthless things. If our time is spent thinking things of little worth then our thoughts are not germinating righteous behaviors enough or at least as often as would be beneficial in our lives and in the lives of others. Consequently we become a person who isn't as dependable to the Lord because of our wasting our minds time in thoughts of little worth.
Robert L. Millet says it this way: "Obviously how we think and what we think about will determine our future, even our destiny. God and his chosen servants have entreated the men of the Church, those called out of the world, to think eternally as they act daily. When we think eternal thoughts, our actions will be lasting and worthwhile. When we think eternally, our impact on our homes and our society will be permanent. When we think eternally, the things that matter most will never be sacrificed to the things that matter least. And when we view our lives from an eternal vantage point, we will recognize that we are indeed agents on the Lord's errand; we will then do things his way." (Men of Valor p. 34-35)
In Doctrine and Covenants section 64:29: "Wherefore, as ye are agents, ye are on the Lord's errand; and whatever ye do according to the will of the Lord is the Lord's business."
As manly men we are recruits of the Lord, consequently we are his agents and we need to do things his way. Of course we will take years to learn and hone those abilities, but if we know now an area we should change then we need to take steps to make that change or be held accountable not only for what we are doing and not doing, but for the good that making that change would lead to in our lives and the lives of others.
So, bottom line, our thoughts need to be of eternal and lasting things, so that our attitudes and actions will be of eternal and lasting things. Please make adjustments as necessary.
"As a man thinketh in his heart so is he." Proverbs 23:7
Homework
Look into what an affirmation is (if you don't already know) and develop 5 affirmations based on eternal values that will guide you in becoming a righteous agent of our God.
