Sometimes we get stuck seeing things our way. Would you like to see some things through another set of eyes? Maybe it will make you think and stretch or maybe just chuckle or shed a tear. Here is my world through my eyes...

Friday, April 1, 2011

From Conception to Birth: A time for change

I was reading this great article from Segulah magazine written by Lani T. Whitney entitled Small Sacrifice.   (Click here to read article).  She mentions some of the difficulties and sacrifices in being pregnant and some thoughts and lessons that came as a result. 

I've had (and continue to have) the priveledge of being a father five times.  My wife has gone through pregnancy that many times and I have gone right along with her.  I remember the joy of that time in the Wilkenson Center when we called the hospital to get the result of the pregnancy test (This was before the at home tests).  The knowlege that we were pregnant was overwhelming as we expressed our excitement at the bank of pay phones that used to be there before cell phones.  People around us could see and hear our excitement although they didn't know the source.  I imagine some grumpy worker there saying in a drone voice "Another couple excited to be pregnant!" 

I remember back to times in our life where we would think with amazement that we had been pregnant more than not in our married life.  Pregnancy didn't often strike me as an ideal situation however to have those pregnancies early in our marriage was the ideal time.  Bodies were young, energy was high and ability to handle the juggling of many important things was at its peak.  So I would encourage those with the choice to have their children when they are young. 

When my wife was pregnant we would often think about the growth of that child and with amazement imagine what was growing and maturing at that point.  We had occasion to lean, for instance, that the brain forms and then connects together in the first couple weeks of pregnancy (assuming my brain is remembering correctly).  So much was happening every day that was truly amazing to produce a human being from such a little start. 

I remember a few years later buying a book to talk about how babies were made with our young children.  It was called A Child Is Born with pictures by Lennart Nilsson.  That book was amazing.  We could see so clearly what was happening as that child grew. It truly is amazing!
A Child Is Born

However; at least equally amazing are the changes that develop in the committed Mother and Father.  As that child is growing and preparing to live externally from the mother, the mother is changing and growing both physically and emotionally to love and care for that child so it can survive outside the mother even in its weakened infant state. 

Possibly most amazing is the way that the father typically grows in maturity and prepares to take on the added responsibility.  Much of this is emotional and mental but boils down to the fact that the father is learning that his selfishness must diminish so that the resources of the family including time and money can be reapportioned to allow and encourage that child's physical, emotional and social growth.  A basic change like how the food budget will change from what the couple preferred to what is absolutely needed for the baby and then the adults will eat off of what is remainder.  This child is a lengthy commitment that sometimes is almost as long as the father's age at the time of the first child.  So that father has to come to grips with the necessity that the couple must put that child first in many ways to raise them to have a chance for the child to reach toward its potential.  The father must be prepared to give up the vestiges of his childhood and to take on the mantal of an adult in a way that hasn't been thrust upon him previously. 

Big changes!  So the child actually is the catylist of the further maturation of the individual parents at the very time that it is at it's weakest.  Such economy in this plan of having families. 

1 comment:

  1. I remember that book!!! You guys used it to teach us where babies come from for an fhe lesson one time!!! I should read it again :) also I never thought about the changes that are going on with the parents while all that growth and change is happening with the baby inside...that is very thought provoking :)


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