Sunday, September 4, 2011

Manly Man Training #22 : Do some good

Sometimes in our world today men have the reputation for doing whatever has to be done. That translates differently for men in different situations and has both positive and negative connotations.

In days gone by many men prided themselves in doing whatever it took to support their family. They did jobs that were difficult and dirty and jobs that did not use their best talents or engage them intellectually. They just did whatever it took to be sure their families had at least the bare minimum and hopefully more. I think that is an admirable trait: willingness to go beyond the comfortable or the preferred to take care of the family.

Nowadays, though; when we talk about men doing whatever has to be done it gets understood that men will do what it necessary, but no more. That leads our minds down a totally different road thinking of men who go to work but won't help around the house or spend all their time in front of the T.V. or involved in selfish pursuits that give little if anything to the family.
So which is it for you? As a Manly Man are you willing to do whatever is necessary and within your power to make sure your families needs are met and maybe some wants too? Or are you a guy who does the bare minimum and then checks out; never doing anything that is out of your comfort zone or requires growth on your part for the betterment of your family?

The latter man suggests a lack of connection to his family, a lack of commitment to the family and a lack of energy, effort and caring for those who are most important in his life. D&C 58:27 "Verily I say, men should be anxiously engaged in a good cause, and do many things of their own free will, and bring to pass much righteousness."

Of course in this scripture the word "men" refers to both genders but for our purposes here I am talking to Manly Men. This scripture tells us that we should be anxiously engaged. This suggests effort, enjoyment and full participation. Anxiously engaged in our families would be good. "And do many things of their own free will". This suggests to me that we should be involved so much that we notice what needs to be done and don't leave it up to our family to ask, compel, beg or guilt us into doing stuff. Of course I'm not suggesting that everything will be evident to us and of course we will need guidance, support and encouragement from our wife and family, but we need to be attentive to life and the needs of the family members as well. "And bring to pass much righteousness" of course suggests that our efforts should be good and worthy efforts not just the bare minimum.

Certainly there are times as men when we are worn out physically, mentally, maybe even spiritually and our attention or efforts will not be our best. But they should always be the best we can manage at the time. If for some reason we are depleted then we need to make our spouse aware of that so they will know and can help us as they are able. If we keep these times to ourselves then not only do we miss out on support and help but we also pretend that we are better than we are and need nothing which will lead to our receiving just that. However; if we find that we are hurting and less able much or all of the time then we need to seek help so we can approach our best selves, our families deserve that.

"All men have been given special powers and within certain limitations should develop those powers, give vent to their own imaginations, and not become rubber stamps. They should develop their own talents and abilities and capacities to their limit and use them to build up the kingdom" (The Teachings of Spencer W. Kimball, p. 257).

This comment by President Kimball really reminds us that we are unique and have special abilities even "powers" as he calls them. These defining characteristics were probably what made us appealing to our wife in the first place. We of course need to develop them and use our imaginations to better use and grow them for the benefit of our families, ourselves and even our societies.

The kingdom is waiting for us to develop them. Whether we refer to our own homes and families or the church and God's kingdom or our neighborhoods, country and the world. We are needed whether our talents only help to support our families (physically, emotionally and spiritually) or goes beyond that to aid and supplement the needs of the world.

Let us not do the minimum, but develop ourselves and our families and God's kingdom so that we all benefit from our best. As Manly Men we need to lead out and be a good example to all around us.


1 comment:

  1. yay! another "manly man"!! :) you bring up an interesting point about the meaning of "doing what it takes" changing from what it used to mean. that's unfortunate that it took on a more negative meaning :( i hope that most men will stick to the original connotation! i really like what you said about doing your best under the circumstances whatever those may be. there are plenty of times when circumstances are less than optimal, but being married and having your spouse to lift you up and point you lovingly in the direction you need to go is such a wonderful blessing :) it's nice to have someone who does that for you and it's nice to BE that person too!!! :) it all comes back to doing your best!! take your best to the limit of best-ness and you can feel pretty great about your efforts :)

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