Motherhood

There is no doubt that we as men don't have adequate appreciation for all that Mothers do.  They keep so many things going including the magic of cleaning clothes and making meals and often working at a job and calming, teaching and raising children.  So much to do and much of it is a challenge.

I had a bit of an opportunity for a few months to learn some things about motherhood from the inside.  When my wife and I moved to this state we agreed that the first one to get a job would go to work and the other would care for our three young children at home.  One was entering the first grade and the two others were not old enough to attend school at the time.  So as luck, or more likely Heavenly Father, had it my wife found the job first.  That meant I was going to learn a lot and have a very interesting several month experience.  I stayed home to care for the children, met my daughter after school and prepared dinner daily.  I think I was first string on washing the clothes too, but I'm sure my wife could tell you for certain.  Over time I began to do day care at my home and had as many as 8 children at home at a time.  I learned to appreciate mothers more than ever! 

As I think back there isn't a lot of detail sticking out in my mind.  Oh, a few specific outstanding experiences and some memories of my learning to make homemade salsa (that was an interest of mine at the time) and I remember writing during nap time, but most of the day to day experience of things is lost to my current memory.  So I have a little insider enjoyment of this video clip entitled "In tha Muthahood".  It is a rap song that is fun and clean. 

I first saw that video on a blog that I read (click here to go to it).  Hopefully you can smile and laugh at the video and not wince and grimace.  That reminds me of a movie about parenthood that Lisa and I saw years ago.  We thought it was pretty funny initially.  Others that we recommended it to didn't think it was funny, they said it hurt or was too much like their family to laugh. 

Mothers most often shape the world for us as a child.  And that shaping lasts far into adulthood. Because mothers are so influential they have gotten much of the blame for things that are going wrong in society as well as in individual people's lives.  I hear that a lot in my field when someone tells me that their behaviors now are due to their mother.  I say if you can think that through well enough to verbalize it that clearly, then you can figure out that you are responsible for your actions now, not your mother! 

The truth is the vast majority of mothers really do all they can and make tremendous sacrifices for their children.  I had an opportunity today to talk to two mothers.  One was retired and her children were grown and another had one child who was just high school age.  The younger one expressed concern over how much to push her child to get him to grow and become the person that he can be.  The other looking at life from the other end was settled, peaceful and supportive of doing the best you can but trusting that they will remember what you have taught them when it is critical.  We decided the trick was in not pushing so much that they learned not to take responsibility but not so little that they didn't think it mattered.  Not an easy balance to make.

As a father, I have been pleased to be a part of that shaping of our children.  I have seen close up the tremendous love and detail involved in motherhood as well as the tremendous sacrifice and deferral of self that a mother does to care for and prepare her children on a daily and life long basis.  I could never diminish those who have fulfilled their life by being a mother.  Instead I can learn from them. 

My mother has been a great influence in my life.  I chose this picture, which is from Christmas 2005, because she has always loved Christmas and Christmas time.  She has taught me that love, not just for Christmas but for Christ.  Aside from that she has taught me to love and care for people, all kinds of people not just ones like me.  She has taught me many things that I treasure to this day and plan to treasure throughout my life. Her influence in my life has gone through me now to my own children.  And since all of them are girls I fully expect that my mother's influence will have great impact on another generation...soon.  Thanks Mom for everything and don't worry, I won't forget you.